Week 75- SEPTEMBER-In A Twinking Of An Eye

Ha! I wish that's what my week was like!  But I'm pretty sure i caught a babushki sitting on a bench in mid twinkle, good for you baba, ya done good. 

Well let me tell you, it's been a loooong week, in other words it been tough, but then i can create my own little haven under a blanket on the couch with my handy dandy AlphaSmart 3000 with some newly found instrumental music, and suddenly think, "Hey it's not so bad, I'm still alive right?"

Getting sick i wouldn't say was the tough part, but i would say it definitely added to the load. You got to thank a great dad for guiding you to Elder Bednars talk "Bear Up Their Burdens With Ease" to help you through a week such as this one. Thanks popichka! (Russian cute form for "dad" :)) It really helps to have such support and guidance from the mom and pops. I wish my comp could say the same thing! Her parents have been included in the large evacuation out of eastern Ukraine and are currently living in another area that does not provide Internet, and last Monday she got one sentence from her parents just confirming that they are OK and that they love her. I couldn't help but count my blessings and feel a little guilty  reading my 15th hobbit novel from the mother.

There was a momentous occasion this week when we ventured out into the the coldest and windiest day of the season so far and made a stop-by to an inactive and...was let into the house! Except it wasn't even the inactive we were looking for but her mother who is a solid member in another ward in another part of Kiev, but still being let into  somebodies house that was not a scheduled lesson is practically myth in my mission, and so the other inactives we planned to stop-by in the area will just have to wait for another time as we chatted over crackers and soft brown apple slices.

District lunch came just in time with the sudden cold weather and Elder and Sister Watts, our amazing senior couple made homeade chicken noodle soup for us. These two are absolutely amazing and have just dedicated their entire life to the Lord, they have already served 3 mini missions and this this is there second full time mission, their first was in Africa. They can't speak the language but you can feel more love and sincerity in their 5 words than you could in a million, not to mention they are the funniest and spunkiest senior couple you will ever meet.

You know I'm a little worried for when i get home and the socially awkward addition i will be to society. I'm afraid i only know how to communicate to Ukrainians and babushki (there are so many of them that i am choosing to give them their own civilization), because I got a little taste of it in the grocery store the other day. There was a woman in the meat section with a very quizzical look on her face and i thought, "Oh yeah, she is SO not from here" and so went over to help her, "Oh why yes, those are stuffed cow liver next to the chicken heads. Oh no that's not apricot jelly, it's actually jellied animal f at." Or at least this is how helpful and informative i was in my head, but it went more along the lines of this...

Me-(Russian)"Can i help you out?"

Her-(English)"Oh oh sorry! Am i in your way?"

Me-(English) "Oh no, you're not i just saw you and the meat and you know...their meat! You never can tell!..."

Her-*silence and confused look at what to say to that*

Me- *clear throat* you're not from here  are you?"

And then i met an English speaking Italian at the cash register as he let me cut in line:

Me-(Russian) Thanks!

Him-(English) You're welcome.

Me-OH! OH! you're not Ukrainian, you're  not normal, er eh i mean this isn't normal to meet...you...I'm from America, and you are....?"

A member in our ward just had a baby! So we and the young woman got together, and with the assistance of Pinterest, made a diaper baby carriage! Pinterst, you DO think of everything.

A great hightlight this week! The Elders had a baptism! They set the conditions that the only way i was invited was if i made brownies, and there was no way i was missing a baptism i went and did as i was commanded. Included is our best attempt of a companionship selfie (yeah, it's not a strength of our companionship, we will discuss it deeply during companionship inventory) and our dear assistants. It was cold that day so do not judge, and needless to say Elder Rich is not the biggest fan of cameras.

My point proven with Elder Rich.

 Wednesday  was just the epitome of awkward. The Sunday before, we signed up on the sign up sheet to meet with a member who was hit by a car about a month or so ago while she was crossing the street, and was then in a comma with many injuries and with a very small chance of living. But with much prayer and many fasts she made a miraculous recovery and is now at home but still struggles to get around on her own. So we signed up for a 3 hour slot to help her around and keep the house in good shape. We wanted to surprise her and so stopped by our neighboring balloon store, and you have to know something about Ukrainians and numbers. When giving balloons and flowers there is a hidden message in the amount you give. Odd numbers: GOOD. Like for birthdays, weddings, anniversaries etc. Even numbers: BAD. For funerals and i guess if you want to be a punk about it, break ups. Keeping this in mind we bought her 3 balloons and started on the awkward adventure in the metro, you know, when your balloons choose to transform into a pack of wild rampaging killers (Tenaya remember the little animated film when a bunch of balloons started beating that innocent pedestrian? Yeah, i wish everybody else understood why i was laughing so hard while waiting for the metro...) So we were almost there and all was great until i heard a loud *BANG!* and looked up and sure enough...two balloons. My thought: "Awww great....now we're giving her death balloons! 

I'll keep the story short and just say it was the longest awkward three hours of my mission and it included Sister Litvinova and I with a voice recorder robotically saying words in English with the Russian translation.

Then it was off to another lesson, on the way there we saw a babushka going down to sit and suddenly her chair exploding into pieces as she fell to the ground (don't worry we were not only spectators but helpers in this, but i feel she would rather nobody seen it at all). A meal was already prepared for us and what i thought was thick slices of cheese and meat was actually butter and meat, and don't ask me how but at some point i actually found it necessary to imitate a "hee haw" at the table like a donkey (oh yeah, we were talking about pinnochio), and then while teaching at some point i must have had my hand to my mouth which i just freshly washed and got a nice chunk of soap in my mouth. I tried smiling and teaching right through it paranoid that a soap bubble would pop out in mid sentence. In that back of my mind i saw it like the scene from the three stooges as they were baby sitting and, thanks to Shemp and a mishap in the kitchen, had bowls of soap soup for dinner. Come on people, if your childhood did not include the three stooges you've missed out.

 Here's just a few shots from this week: The metro, my multiple times everyday walk across the street to go home passing the babushki that are yelling, "raspberries! girls! fresh raspberries!", and more street marketers. Gosh i love the look of fresh produce. Seriously if you would have ever told me that i would eat a salad with beets, pickles, and sour cabbage, AND LIKED IT, i would have slapped you and called you silly.

I wish with all my heart that i could say that this last picture is an act....

XOXOXOXO

-Сестра Ро

Your Weekly Sundae-A Book of Mormon Story

Hello everybody! I hope you're all having a great week, and here's your weekly Sundae!

So as well as Christ being the center of our church, there is also one very important piece, the “keystone” you could say, that holds this church together, and that's The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ.

Now I know what some of you may be thinking, “But we already have a testament of Jesus Christ; we have the Bible.” But peoples beliefs about the Bible vary widely. Some believe that the Bible is absolutely perfect, without error, and that it is all we need to be saved. Others think the Bible is literature worth studying, but they deny that it is evidence of Christ’s divinity and miracles or direct revelation from God. Some choose to ignore the Bible, some say they believe while their Bible at home stay covered in dust, and others have never seen the Bible or had a chance to read it.

So what is the Book of Mormon? The Book of Mormon is another volume of holy scripture, that testifies to us that God does live and guide His church today through a living prophet, and that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is the very same church which Jesus Christ established when He came to the earth.

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints we use the Book of Mormon and the Bible to support one another. Far from competing with the Bible, the Book of Mormon supports it, exhorts us to read it, and testifies of the truthfulness of its message.

Im going to be honest with you and say that there is absolutely no way you can really come to know our faith until you read the Book of Mormon. No amount of research on the internet, or books you read, or friends you ask, or things you hear will ever qualify you to say that you know who the "Mormons" are. So my challenge for you this week: Let your faith be tried! If curiosity has peaked your interest, read the Book of Mormon. We also have our church website, Mormon.org, where you can find questions answered by real Mormons! Or better yet, ask the missionaries!

Feel free to send input or ask questions, and see you at English!

Until next week!

-Sister Roe

Week 74- SEPTEMBER-Packaged or Bulk?

AWESOME

• JUMBO TOILET PAPER
• Technology mixed with the gospel! The prophet and his apostles really know what they are talking about because it really can spread like wildfire! This week one of the senior missionaries in our district said that the "Daily Sundae" he received, he liked so much that he sent it to all of his children, his bishop back in his home ward, and his stake president!Sharing your beliefs is so much fun, and...BONUS your testimony grows along the way! Watch this awesome little video and see how amazing technology can be used to share the gospel! Sharing Your Beliefs
• Placing a Book of Mormon to a JW
• Solo teaching your intermediate English class of 17! 
• Ukrainian apple spice compote! Oh my holy holiday smell! We're making this everyday!
• When you have a companion who can cook lunch and you at long last can take that 5 minute nap you've been dreaming of in the sun spot on the couch
• When you get compliments! I forgot how rare those are to come by in the mission field! But I've never been so happy to be told I'm, "down to earth" i guess i should thank my hippie parents for that one. Get it? Down to earth? Hippie parents?......OK, moving on
• Going on an exchange with your fellow St. Georgian!
• When one of your English students surprises you with your favorite dark chocolate and says, "Sweet for sweet!" Oh....oh you're good. 
• God's timing. Even if that means that you get trapped in a church with a schizophrenic man, get saved by the Elders who just happend to really need to use the bathroom and so went to the church, and then running into the most amazing woman on your way home. Woman with heavy bags, im telling you people, that's what the elect are ALWAYS doing
• When you end an exchange with your sister training leader and you just KNOW that she left you a note somewhere and you check the every crook and cranny on your study desk to find nothing.....then later the next day you open up your wallet to find a secret note fall out onto the floor
• Service with the sisters! And of course that would only include flying broom shots in commemoration of the Autumn weather
• Dedooshka's with remote control cars

AWKWARD

• Getting lost from your companion in the middle of the dark nowhere for two hours and spending your evening as a threesome with the elders, with vivid images of your companion shivering in some corner with the cities stray dogs
• Russian word vomit: "How can we better share the animal water?" (mixing "animal" with "living") OR my particular favorite, "How can we improve our scripture study? Pee. Pee! Pee! Pee!" (and for the millionth time mixing up "write" with the word "pee.")
• Finishing a lesson and getting your bag all packed up and ready to go when all of a sudden a bowl of what seems to be rotten vegetables are placed in front of you, and you're told, "Peel!"
• That moment when you you are sitting in a room waiting for the Elders to give you a blessing and they ask, "OK who do you want to do the sealing and who do you want to do the anointing?" and you're just like, "Oh it's not for illness, I'm just a lost, slightly discouraged missionary looking for identity and purpose in life."
• When you call all the leaders of the ward asking them if they know anyone in the ward who are needing any help or service and the long silences afterwards makes you feel like you just asked for their social security number
• When you've finally stooped down to the point that your scraping your peanut butter jar with a spatula
• Visiting an art museum filled with local young artists.....art? Stuffed birds with human legs, murals of random home appliances made with metallic beetles wings, a moving portrait of 4 babushka sisters crying, and a big rock secluded to a dark room that hummed and vibrated like the air conditioner outside of my bedroom window at home. Am i in an art museum or inside the mind of a crazy person put inside of a building?
• Spending night #2 looking for the nonexistent #532 bus
• Pulling our your scarves and boots for the cold weather. We meet again bulk.....
• When this is how your companion chooses to describe you....Sister Roe during long meetings
• When your just doing your thang pulling weeds and all of a sudden you get a strong feeling that two pairs of eyes are on you. You don't want to look too paranoid so you slowly look around, scanning the territory for the creep, when all of a sudden you meet those beady little eyes...oh it's just a poopers! (Apologies, but if i ever see a dog it will always be referred to by me as a "poopers," ask me no questions for i have no explanation.)

Week 73- SEPTEMBER-Be A New Lump

This is the kind of revelation you receive when you accidentally go to the wrong scripture after finding a secret note from one of your sister training leaders. "Purge out therefore the old leaven, that ye may BE A NEW LUMP..."Now i can't really tell you what leaven is, but when reading this i thought, "is this some kind of sick fat joke?" and just laughed when i saw that it was 2 Corinthians 5:7 i was to read, NOT 1 Corinthians 5:7. "For we walk by faith, not by sight :)" (who would have thought that even the scriptures is into icon faces!and who says the church isn't hip?) Well, i guess that scripture is good too.

Well coming across this unintended scripture it just so happens to fit into what has become my new obsession of the mission!The life and example of JESUS CHRIST. And i do say it's about time!I think it really started as i was preparing my thought to go with my weekly email that i have begun to send out to any member or non-member who desires! I even sent around a sign up sheet from our English class and am now spiritually nourishing over 50 people from English! With me needing to work on my Russian, and my companion needing to work on her English we came up with the idea to each send an email in the language we are trying to learn and give everyone the chance to practice English and/or each get their own weekly "Sundae" and I'm including my blog in this too so each week you get a sweet som'n som'n too.

This week i started off with my favorite video of all time BECAUSE OF HIM and good gosh after watching it 20+ times I'm still obsessed. Everybody will admit that most of the time people really only dive deep into something if they know they are going to be tested on the subject or teach about it, and this was the case for me. So instead of just watching with bulbous eyes i got in deep with pen and paper writing down thoughts that came to my head about the life of Jesus Christ and all that He did, and something became more clear to me. We don't just believe in Jesus Christ, we believe in FOLLOWING Jesus Christ. Christ did not just spend 30 years of His life on Earth just to get to his last hours to suffer and die for us, He spent 30 years of His life being the perfect example we can follow.

I feel like this is an often forgotten concept, as so much, if not too much, focus is put on His death and suffering, that many of His teachings and examples are forgotten and unfollowed. Oh how many times have i heard, "I have faith, God is one" as hands go up to touch the crosses on their necks, and they feel that that is enough for them, and that they feel content with it almost shocks me. Acknowledging the life and goodness of another does not make us better people, it's what we choose to do with that example. I think that's one of the most prominent things that sets this church apart from others. This is a church that not only believes in Christ,but strives in following His perfect example. Jesus Christ did not just live to die! He gave us 30 years of example, so study up and follow! Me personally? Well, I'm making a daily reading of Jesus the Christ and the New Testament to better know his life and example. "Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new." aka....BE A NEW LUMP! How do ya like that for spiritual nourishment, eh?

Last Monday for family home evening we had a little testing of the brain with a member of the ward and played some Book of Mormon trivia! You would think having my nose in a book for 16 months i would know it quite decently by now, but i hereby testify that Book of Mormon trivia will humble you down to the dust, but that it will also spark a desire to know the facts! So for all you hunting for a fhe idea, just type in Book of Mormon trivia into Google, and whala! Now all you got to worry about is what's for dessert.

This transfer is already going by super fast, I swear just yesterday i said i have 4 months left...now 2 1/2! There's definent mixed feelings about it, but you can always count on a mother to make you feel closer to home even when you're on the other side of the world. From laughing like an old heaving man reading about the pug back home and her reaction to an obnoxious fly outside when she's trying to snooze, and their reaction while watching the dogs watch a bumblebee repeatedly crashing into the window, and her sick satisfaction, and Finally murdering the "sticky fly" that landed on the head or arms of anyone who sat down to use the laptop. Or how she caught that same pug's face planted in a litter box and being approached with cat litter decored jowls. How dad pre-soaked then divide a pig's ear for the dogs and finding out he's also buying cat treats for a stray black cat at work down on campus. Or that fact that my mother grabbed a free pen and travel toothpaste from an office when no one is looking, how she stummbled upon a YouTube soundtrack of "10 hrs. of rain on a tin roof", of large ambling scorpions, and a very disturbing story of your dog having a bowel movement. It got to the point i was laughing and heaving so hard i actually had to leave the room to let my companion sleep! (Do not worry, she only went to bed early, 10:30pm and im out)

This week we had a chess night at the church with a full 7 people there! Ok, so it was a failure, but i saw the most adorable old man that immdiatly had me smiling making me think of the Pixar short film when that old man was playing chess with himself!

You know, sometimes serving alongside the Assistants to the president, the zone and district leader, and the sister training leaders you can sometimes ask youself, "Am i a missionary or a drowing clownfish?" (drowing fish, i know i know i know, ironic, but this is the only way i feel to explain at the current moment)  but i seriously love each and every missionary in the district! We had the a little party during our lunch hour in celebration of Sister Hardy's birthday!

With the help of a mystery missionaries christmas package and a leftover box of Betty Crocker cake mix (ya done good Betty) the birthday cake was not forgotten. And thank you balloon store located directly next door! But ill tell you it was quite an adventure traveling with those on the metro. While waiting for the metro and the drafts coming for the tunnel all of a sudden what was once a pleasent mass of floating colors was suddenly a raging mob of rainbow punching balls! I could do nothing but hide inside the balloon mass as the 10+ people around me were trying recover from the beating and fix their static hair.

The birthday sister. In my opinion 22 is the age of manhood, and so it would only be appropriate....

Perchersky Transfer 11 district (minus the Elder right behind me, the Elders we're on exchanges and our zone leader was absent. And i would just like to take your attention to the sister missionary calves on the far left, uhhh huh, i swear our calves are going to explode if they are ever put into heels above 2")

The party came to an end and while out contacting i popped the question to my companion Sister Litvinova, "Hey, when's YOUR birthday?" Her reply, "tomorrow".......?!?!
So with the help of pig latin texts and phone calls while your comp is in the shower we manage to think something up...

Suprise ballons, exploding ice cream (no seriously, our ceilings still hold the proof. They should put warning label on their air sealed rolls of ice cream saying "WARNING: Exploding dairy. Keep away from children), and a heart attacked door later i would say a Happy Birthday was given. Happy 20th companion!

 Speaking of doors...here's some Ukrainian site seeing beauty i found while out contacting for 5 1/2 hours. Yeah, when buildings dont have numbers, and streets dont have signs it tends to make things a little more difficult.

Coffee bob, ciggarette bob, and fruit boy. Yup, im in Ukraine all right. Ok about the ciggarette bob, you can find one at almost every metro, and it's like a taste testing for ciggarettes!

At long last fruits are beginning to be seen! These past two weeks we have been able to meet with 4 different girls who were all contacted over 2 months ago, but with stubborn follow up, we were able to meet! Including one of my favorite girls of all time! I talked with her on the metro and we really have become such good friends. The first thing she said to me when she saw me the other day was, "Oof, you look tired." Ya think?!

Oh, aaaaand more contacting pics. Yeah, this week wasn't the best for getting lessons.

Yes, that is a big mass of meat (not too sure what kind...) on a hot pipe. This glorious invention is what we call Sharma, the most delicious burrito Ukraine has ever seen, but Ukrainians would say otherwise

I have some advice for any missionary who is put in charge of the weekly missionary newspaper. RUN. Or you may be like me and be running back and forth 3 days in a row to the printing center. Day #1: Ok, they will be done in an hour if you want to wait. *one hour later*  Oh, im sorry our printer broke half way through, come back tomorrow." Day 2: "Oh gosh im sorry, we forgot to call you and our printer still isn't fixed, tomorrow for sure." Day 3: "Here ya go! 100 grieven please."

It kinda defeated the whole purpose of our whole plan to get it done and printed in one day, but i guess forgetting your flashdrive in the computer doesn't help too much. *ring ring ring* "Hey Elder Rich? Are you still at the church? Is my flashdrive in the computer?" Elder Rich, ".......yup." The entire conversation in my head went a lot like the scene from Emporers New Groove right before the went over the waterfall....Naya, you know what i mean. I love how i feel you are the only one who understands me in these things.

After wards we were so starving we say the vending machine with the last snickers in it like it was sent from heaven, but soon realized the machine didn't accept big bills, and so hunkered in a corner we managed up enough scrap change for a snickers to split for dinner. Sorry mom.

Last night was spent on a birthday goose chase for a dome that i swear to this day does not exist. Sister Litvinova and Bob the balloon and I had some good bonding time. I seriously love this sister! She is a timid speaker but she always suprises me with.....well see for youself....

P-Day Borsh with Sister Litvinova!

Have a great week! And remember.....be a new lump!

XOXOXOXO

-Сестра Ро